Two Jabs and Electrically Cauterized at the Crotch

Two days before I got back from Langkawi, I was feeling a slight pain at my upper inner thigh. There was a small growth chilling out there, minding its own business thus far until my excessive brisk walks during the exhibition caused it to be chafed. There was also a slight bleeding to it probably because the thighs sliding as I walk caused a bit of a tear where the not-so-little growth attached to the skin.

Several days after returning, on the advise of my colleague, I went to see the doctor to treat the pain. Perhaps the doctor would have some sort of salve or lotion to ease the pain. Or perhaps he would put an adhesive patch over it to avoid further physical trauma to the growth as it (maybe, I thought) heals itself.

No such luck. What happened next was… well, you can read the transcript of the chat between Sila and I as soon as I got back from the clinic:

me:
Guess what I just did.

Sila:
what?

me:
I lay down on doctor’s table.

Sila:
oh dear
you ok?

me:
He stuck me in the inner thigh with needle, close to the testicles.
Then he put a grounding plate under my butt.
Then he took a pair of forceps and started pinching and pulling on the corn that was the cause of my pain the last couple of days.
Until there was no pain.
Then he took a cauterizer and started to burn away at the corn till it came out.
He said it was a bleeder, so he used the cauterizer to seal the bleeding.

Sila:
omg!!!

me:
But I felt that.
So he stuck me with ANOTHER needle.
And proceeded to seal the open wound by burning it with an electrical device.

Sila:
omg!

me:
Then he said he was done, cleaned it up, put some salve on it.

Sila:
:-O

me:
Then he patched it up.
Good stuff?

Sila:
wooo
did you get pictures?

me:
No I should have though.

Sila:
yah!

me:
I’ve never had a cauterizer so close to my testicles before, neither.
Or any part of my body for that matter.

Sila:
don’t you mean “nether”

me:
Yeah yeah. LMAO

Well, the doctor called it a corn. It didn’t seem like a corn or a callus to me. Yes, I saw it after it was removed and put in some solution in a plastic case. Looks fleshy and… yeah, I should have taken a picture of it. After two anaesthetic needle jabs and burnt by an electric cauterizer, I went home hobbling with a patch on the inner thigh and my teeth still gritting at the thought of having fleshy bits being burnt off me for medical reasons.

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Khairul Hisham J. is a freelance artist, writer, editor, translator, English language teacher and a long time tabletop role-playing game player and gamemaster.

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