Thoughts Old and New Spiralling Unheeded

Reloading Spoons

Reloading Spoons

Previously, on Hishgraphics blog…

It has been months since I posted. The last published blog post announced of our entire household’s infection with COVID-19. Sorry to disappoint some readers, but we yet live. The infection did not saddle us with severe symptoms.

However, I have not posted for a long time and it is time to rectify that. The reason why I have not posted is because I found it a huge chore to conceive blog posts, formulate the text and prepare images. In the interim, besides the week-long COVID-19 bout, I have been for the last two years suffering from eczema, and last week a doctor diagnosed me with arthritic psoriasis whereby my left knee hurt immensely making it hard for me to be mobile.

This has (not had) the effect of making it hard to manage my classes in the previous semesters. I enjoy the classes and interacting with my students, but all of these swiftly and surely depletes me of my spoons, daily, weekly and monthly. In fact, it has been difficult to sit down and write for any reason, even for my Master’s Degree. Lately I have been reinforcing my mental health for the benefit of my family and my students, and not much else. In fact, I have been visiting a therapist in hopes to improve my mental health.

I seem to be perpetually exhausted. And overwhelmed. I cannot find the energy to prepare (even a rough outline) to run RPG sessions online in the past several months, much less writing actual play reports about them as I have been doing for a decade now. I have stopped planning any RPG sessions with Irfan even.

The Future

Being so exhausted, I feel like I need to give myself a boost, thus this fresh new blog post. This might be classified as baby steps. I need to climb out of this rut. So, to my readers, all two of you – maybe less – watch for new material to pop up on this blog in the near future.

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Khairul Hisham J. is a tabletop RPG artist, writer, proofreader, translator, teacher, grad student and learner-in-general.


  1. Hey Hish, hang tough! I know what you mean about feeling exhausted, and I haven’t even (knock wood) gotten Covid, so I don’t have a legit excuse. Hope with some rest and reflection you’ll be back at it.

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